Feel, Feels, Felt
by Evillevi
Summary: To have lost everything. To have nothing to lose. A meeting that should not be. It happened anyway. One shot that went out of control.


She did it every day. Watering the plants, that is.

So it didn't surprise anyone when the first thing that sweet, gentle Aerith when they moved to Hollow Bastion was to demand a garden. After all she loved taking care of flowers. And their guilt for leaving her behind overwhelmed the morality of bending the rules for said gardens.

She stayed back every day, waiting for them.

When they went out hunting heartless she stayed behind. None of them doubt how dangerous she was but they left her behind. For who would want to risk their innocent flower, despite whatever thorns she might have to protect herself. And so removed were they from her life that it actually came as a surprise when she introduced her, _possibly,maybe_, love to them two months later.

* * *

She hid it well enough but Aerith Gainsborough was lonely.

Her little house stood tall and valiant at the side. Leon may have been very generous with his gift but it was too large, too empty for her. And so she waited outside. Waited for days on days on days.

Ever since the heartless invaded, ever since she fled from Gaia, she had spent most of her time with her friends. After all the pain for being alone was too much for her. Not after Zack, not after Avalanche and not after cloud.

She was lonely so she sought comfort where ever that may be. With Yuffie, with Cid, With Merlin, and with the stars that she shared with **them**.

And each night when the town was sleeping she got out into her garden, lay down on the grass and stare at the heavens until she fell asleep. No one notice naturally, she was alone after all, even when surrounded by people

But one day something. And they did not know this but something monumental will change their lives.

So oneday the first clack of shoes on the road went echoing through the night. It startled Aerith.

Clack again went the sound, And she was up and about. Curiosity tug on her mind and her body followed, her pyjamas trailing behind her as she opened the gates and walked outside. And she stopped dead cold when she saw Cloud walking down the streets without a care to the world.

He looked almost, almost, like he did in Midgar. He had his untidy hair yet it looked so **him**. His clothes new, casual, different and yet he was the epitome of comfort. And his blue, awe filled, eyes looked at her. Enticing, entrancing.

She wanted, hoped and lied to herself that this was Cloud. Dreams that they would be reunited coming to the forefront.

But it can't be. Cloud was Dead. It can't be. Cloud was gone.

But there he was. In a white Jacket. Strolling down the streets while taking in the sights his hands clasped behind his back. His eyes still on her.

"Errr… Hello?"

His voice brought her back. And she tore herself from that vivid blue eyes. Steeled herself because she had to know. Her voice trembling with hope, with fear she asked

"Cloud?"

Now he looked at her not with awe but with confusion. And that hesitation broke her heart.

And when he said "No I'm not", it shattered

No. No. No she wouldn't cry. She already did so long ago. The water running down her face was just the rain. And. And-

"Hey. Are you alright? Hey!"

His arms, warm. His voice sure, soft and passionate. His body, short yet proud and confident. This and a number of things she noticed even as he somehow guided, _too short this not-Cloud_, her into her house.

And even now she still had the presence of mine to mumble off her line muzzle up some of her well used skills to say "I'm fine."

He looked at her again, eyes gleaming as he took in her image. The he shook his head. And he did what no one, not Cloud or Zack or Tifa or anyone had ever done.

He said three words.

Three words with a quiet conviction that he was correct.

"No you're not."

* * *

Roxas knew that Superior wouldn't like it that he left the castle. But everything was so new. Everything a mystery to be explored. So walking down the newly founded city of Hollow Bastion he did not regret anything, for even if he had no heart he had a drive to know. To unravel the secrets of the world around him. To know what made Somebodies ticked so he can be like them. Because that was what the Thirteen was about. To have the drive to be Someone.

He already finished his mission at any rate. Axel took him to the clock tower some hours back but to be honest outside general confusion he had not bothered with remembering anything. After all Nobodies can't feel. And predictably he felt nothing.

So down the street he went. Uncaring of where his feet will take him. Shoes clacked sharply as sure steps guided him from the edges of the city into its inner sanctum on the hill.

Stone houses filled his vision; the only differences between them were the varying state of disrepair.

But all of them were special. He could feel it. Every dent, every scratch, a history onto itself. And he wandered on, eyes greedily drinking in anything he was lucky enough to notice.

At least until something interrupted him. Someone moved, gracefully, over a wall and landed in front of him. In the back of his mind he could hear someone tell him to get his key blades and get ready for a fight. But some inexplicable sensation halted his hands

And that sensation gave way to a twinge in his heart as he gazed upon beauty. Long flowing hair that shimmered around her like veil. An aura of something, caressing his body, his soul. And beyond anything it was the eyes that captured his attention.

Green eyes that moved and changed even when stilled. Roxas felt like he was looking into the depths of chaos as he tried and failed to put a name to it.

So he stared at her, and she, him.

And after a second, an hour, a minute, his mouth moved without any real thought.

"Err… Hello?" he said, for what do people say at this time of night, when the moon shined high?

She snapped back as though slapped and Roxas felt a twinge of pain. Why? He did not know.

But when she looked at him again he felt desperate.

And for the first time in his short life Roxas wanted something.

Something to react to. Anything to tell him, hint to him on what to do. But he only had her eyes in his mind and still he could not name the thing behind them.

"Cloud?" she asked. Her shaking arms showed something. Finally Roxas had a clue. But it hurt to know that it was fear that he found in her.

It took him but a second to look consider his situation. A second to know that only the truth would suffice for he had no reason to lie.

"No I'm not." Roxas said. And no he wasn't for it was the truth.

It came as a shock to him when she fell to the ground rather than run away. And some instinct acted out and he caught her before she dropped to the ground.

"Hey. Are you alright? Hey!" The words came out as a whisper, Roxas unwilling to destroy the privacy of the moment.

And the world was silent as she pondered on something. And after a few second Roxas decided to take matters into his own hands.

She was far too tall so with a twist he hoisted her unto her legs, his head just shorter than her shoulders forcing him to half carry her into her house. Her house because it was the only that look lived in on the street.

At any rate the woman was not only calm but allowed herself to be lead into the unlocked house, her body listless.

And somehow, as they were walking, she looked at him with clear eyes, tears long gone.

"I'm fine. Really." she said.

'No you're not' he thought, sure that he is right

And he said that out loud too.

"No you're not,"

They didn't say anything minutes later when he dragged her onto her couch.

Not a word as Roxas, obeying some higher instinct, cradled her in his arms.

And soundless he left when she fell asleep.

But in his head Roxas knew that he would be coming back. He wanted answers for why she hid herself, why she tried to throw him away with lies and facades.

And most of all he needed, desperately, to know why for one moment he **felt** want.

For it was absolute that nobodies. **Can. Not. Feel**.

Wasn't it?


End file.
